This is the first year, since his daddy passed away, that my youngest child has expressed a desire to celebrate his birthday. He wants an afternoon of ax throwing with some of his favorite guys and then a party at the park where he's requested that I bring all of the sports equipment for he and the guys to play with. He's been excited about this celebration for two months. Before bed, however, he got a bit emotional and had a difficult time articulating how difficult it is celebrating his birthdays, since losing his dad...especially with his birthday being so close to the date of Darrell's passing.
The year he passed away, I remember my baby saying through irrepressible sobbing, "Daddy is going to miss my first double digit birthday." Tonight, he didn't have to say it because I already knew what he was thinking..."Daddy isn't here to celebrate my birthday again." We hugged and shared those raw emotions before praying together. Like most people, I've experienced a tremendous amount of pain and suffering in my 44 years. I've never experienced a hurt greater than not being able to fix my child's broken heart, however. I can't fix it. Period.
Oh...but God!
He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away. -Revelation 21:4
It's after midnight on September 28th...therefore my baby is officially twelve! If you, sweet reader, feel so inclined, please lift Jacob up in a special birthday prayer today. I covet those prayers.
My Dearest Jiggy,
The Lord sure blessed me so well when he chose me to be your mama. You have filled our family, to the brim and then proceeded with copious amounts of overflow, with so much laughter! Your comedic personality, I'm certain, is the reason my laughter lines have deepened within the past twelve years. Thank you for filling this house with so much of all the good stuff! Aside from your side-splitting wit, you are also one of the most empathetic and compassionate people I've ever known. I pray that aspect of you never leaves. I love the fact that younger children and babies flock to you...you are absolutely tenderhearted and precious. While God is the reason our family is back in church, He used you to encourage your mama to leave the comfort of her safety net, after covid. I'm so incredibly proud of you for having so much reverence for God at such a young age. Never dim your light, sweet darling. Continue to be a beacon for Him. You are always the first to jump up and help, when it's time for chores...and, most of the time, do things without me having to ask. That is much appreciated! You are a straight A student and definite rule follower. Not even willing to skip school for your birthday. Ha. You make your mama and older siblings so proud, bud! I pray this 12th year of life is sheer joy and blessings for you! Love and be loved. Bless and be blessed! I'm so thankful to have had a front seat these twelve years. It's an honor and a privilege being your mama. Happy, happy birthday, lovebug!
Love Always, Mama
Here are some of our favorite photos of Jacob, as well as some fun facts about the birthday boy: